Sharkbait's Local Spot

Originally uploaded by thegirlinthecurl

Brought to you by Starbucks.

This cracker looks scarily like my cat's head:

Mark and I have really been looking forward to seeing Harry Potter and the Half-blood Prince. However, we haven't really had the time or money to go see a 2.5+ hour film in San Francisco. The availability of this one has been quite difficult to work around as well. We finally settled on date night, this Sunday evening. We justified the higher price of the IMAX 3D experience by deciding to forgo any alcohol purchases for a week. A good deal all around.

The fridge is almost empty, so we left a little early to grab some light fare at the Metreon. We drove there, being that a BART ride was going to be $6 per person, and take forever since it's Sunday. We parked at the 5th and Mission garage, place with a sordid past for me. Fool me twice...

We bought our tickets first, at $17 apiece. The cashier happily and wordlessly took our money, giving no allusion to the shortchanging we were in for. Wish an hour and a half to spare, we then wandered around the Metreon, looking for best food options.

There was a 'farmer's market' going on. I use quotes because I really, really doubt that any of those people were actual farmers, but rather middle-man vendors with overpriced goodies and faux-homemade packaging. They were all also repeatedly engaging us with hard-sell tactics, which is closer to timeshare than cropshare.

I passed on the $6 for a 12oz. cup of orange juices and the pita plus hummus for a Hamilton. Instead, we wandered through what was left of the expensive fast-food options. Only a few remain standing since the recession. We settled on Firewood, because they were advertising 3 Korean BBQ tacos for $7. Or so we thought.

Turns out that if you actually want some meat in those tacos, its gonna cost you a bit more. And if you want some chips and salsa with that, be prepared to pay (too much) for it. With our cups of free water, our total was $14.

It also turned out that there was nothing Korean or BBQ about our tacos. This is my surprised face.

Wandered some more, and couldn't resist the candy machine spewing runts. Except that is not accurate at all. For 50¢, you get approximately TEN pieces of candy. This on a machine that advertised "BIGGER PORTIONS!" Whatever. I should have bought a gumball, FOR A DOLLAR.

Next we took our supremely awesome 3D glasses and waited for the film to start. A voice came over the theater speakers and mumbled something about when to take our glasses on and off, and then ended it with an ominous caveat of "If you want a refund for this movie, you must do so now." Huh?

But, 12 minutes into the film, it became apparent why this warning was given. Turns out that, unbeknown to us, the film is only 3D for the initial opening scenes. If you don't know this (because you weren't told by anyone at any point along your journey) it becomes an abrupt awakening, akin to "HEEEEEEY, I just got screwed!" coupled with a feeling of being torn between enjoying a movie you've just committed to, and being stuck holding a bag 'o bitter.

I tried to forget that all of this just happened and lose myself in the film. This was hard since I had no place to put my ridiculously oversized glasses. Also, the sound was deafeningly loud. Why? No seriously, WHY ARE MOVIE THEATERS SO GODDAMN LOUD?!

Nonetheless, I mostly enjoyed the film. I forgot about the ending, which was another bummer however. Harry Potter himself was less of an insufferable asshole as he was previously, which was nice. Hermione got ridiculously hot, and seeing the director's attempts at playing this down while keeping her current and relevant was pretty amusing. She's got a great body and great clothes and there's just no way for her to wear them without it being somewhat sexualized. It made some of the male character's lack of interest in her seem farcical. Especially paired with her woe-is-me narrative of rejection. She just isn't a forlorn nerdy undesirable anymore. I think they were just downright forced to drop the precocious, know-it-all schtick she had going on – nobody was going to buy it. It was over even before the 3D was.

That wasn't all though. The night topped off with a $17.50 parking tab. We reluctantly paid it and cursed ourselves all the way home.

In spite of all this, Mark and I had a great time. We seem to weather these things really well together, especially when situations get pear shaped for whatever reason. It sucks, but we don't get bent. We laugh. What else is there, really?

But next week we are avoiding people, franchises and anything requiring sticking bills, coins or cards into stupid little machines. A walk in the woods will do us good.